The term energy vampire is often used to describe someone who drains the emotional, mental or spiritual energy of others, leaving them depleted. But energy vampirism is not always about dramatic outbursts or obvious negativity. Sometimes, it shows up more subtly through exploitation, entitlement and the refusal to do one’s own inner work.
What Is an Energy Vampire?
An energy vampire is someone who becomes obsessed with feeding off the results of another person’s effort, creativity or healing, without sincerely honouring the source. Instead of cultivating their own light, they lean heavily on another’s glow.
My Lived Experience
In my own journey, I’ve experienced this pattern across friendships, professional spaces and even romantic relationships. I would share ideas openly in private conversations or collaborative spaces - only to see them presented later as if they were someone else’s original concept and often without my consent.
At first, I chose to overlook it. I thought it was “common knowledge,” or told myself it wasn’t worth the conflict. But over time, I realised my silence was serving as permission for these individuals to continue exploiting my creativity.
Whether they were consciously aware of their actions or not, the result was the same: my energy, originality and trust were being violated and siphoned without respect nor acknowledgment.
The Power of Boundaries
Thankfully, I have since learned to set firm boundaries. Today, I unapologetically charge a fee for my unique creativity. What I once dismissed as “just ideas” are in fact valuable offerings born from years of education, lived experience, reflection and original talent.
Yes, setting boundaries has resulted in retaliation from those who preferred access without accountability. But more importantly, it has gifted me something priceless: peace, dignity and the knowledge that my energy is no longer taken for granted.
Lessons on Energy Exchange
Here is what I’ve learned:
- Your energy is currency. Protect it as you would your finances.
- Boundaries are sacred. They don’t make you selfish; they make you sustainable.
- Exploitation thrives on silence. When you don’t name or address it, it grows.
- Honouring yourself invites honour from others. People learn how to treat you by how you treat yourself.
An Invitation to You
Have you ever been an energy vampire? Or have you tolerated one in your life? The truth is, we’ve all had moments where we’ve unconsciously taken more than we’ve given. The invitation is not to condemn, but to become more conscious of how we exchange energy.
May we learn to give with sincerity, to receive with gratitude, and to honour the sacredness of energy in all its forms - emotional, creative, spiritual and relational.