For much of my life, I did not have the words to name the patterns of abuse I was experiencing. Violence showed up in different forms - through family who violated my boundaries, romantic partners who betrayed my trust, friends who bullied or mocked me and even professional spaces where I was diminished and silenced.
Each time, I found myself unable to speak up meaningfully until the very worst had already happened. I thought endurance meant strength and silence meant peace. But in truth, I was caught in a karmic cycle of abuse.
What Is a Karmic Relationship?
A karmic relationship is often described as one that carries lessons we need to learn - cycles that repeat until we finally break them. These connections are usually intense, triggering and often painful. They can show up in family, friendships, romance or work.
The purpose is not punishment, but awakening: to reveal what wounds need healing and what boundaries must be built. Until we learn the lesson, the cycle tends to repeat itself, often with different faces but familiar patterns.
My Experience With Karmic Cycles
Looking back, I see how this played out across my life:
- In family relationships, where I was violated and my speaking out was dismissed.
- In romantic relationships, where betrayal and violence left me questioning my worth.
- In friendships, where varied forms of bullying chipped away at my confidence.
- In professional spaces, where gaslighting and intimidation made me doubt my own voice.
In all these settings, I didn’t know how to stand up for myself. I absorbed the harm, hoping things would change, but the cycle only deepened for as long as I did not unapologetically recognise my value.
Breaking the Cycle
It took another traumatic experience - one that shook me to my core - for me to finally see the pattern. I realised that nothing about abuse is ever “insignificant.” Every micro-aggression, every dismissal, every violation is a red flag and tolerating them only fuels the cycle.
Now, I have no tolerance for even the slightest inconvenience when it comes to my peace and safety. I know too well that every small dismissal has the potential to spiral into something greater. Breaking the karmic cycle meant reclaiming my voice, my boundaries and my right to live without violence.
Lessons Learned
- Abuse is never insignificant: Small dismissals accumulate into deep wounds.
- Your silence does not protect you: It often emboldens the abuser.
- Cycles repeat until you break them: Healing requires awareness, courage and action.
- Boundaries are sacred: They are acts of love and protection, not selfishness.
An Invitation to You
If you find yourself in recurring cycles of harm, I invite you to pause and reflect: What lesson might life be asking me to learn? What boundaries must I build to protect my peace?
Breaking a karmic cycle is not easy, but it is liberating. It is the moment you declare: “This ends with me.”